$49,000 Hooker Gets Arrested When She Tries to Go to Church!

Ok, that's not a real News Headline, this is about.....

Who else would it be about people? Me!

I woke up on the wronnnnnnnnng side of the bed this morning. I've been asked a couple of times why I was in such a bad mood. A friend helped me figure out why. My dreams!

I know they were only dreams, but they did a number on me!

They were really weird dreams.

In the first, I was doing something and found out someone died. I was next of kin and this person left me $49 million dollars in their will. Then, someone popped up and was "closer" next of kin than I was so I didn't get the $49 million. The person felt bad for me and wrote me a check for $49,000. Then I woke up at that point and was like, where the fuck is my check? I remember saying that out loud. After realizing it was a dream I went right back to sleep.

Dream 2 is even more f*cked up.

In real life I've been looking for a non-denominational church to begin attending. Well in the dream, I was visiting my mom's church during some function they were having. But it wasn't her church, this church was wayyyy out in the boondocks somewhere, but it had thousands of members. My mom's church is very small, less than 300 members.

So I'm at the dream church and apparently had been there all day because I decided it was getting late and I was ready to leave, but the sermon hadn't even started yet. Well, I got up and kissed my mom goodbye and all the church members stood up and clapped. That was weird as hell to me so I thought I better get out of there as quick as I could.

I finally found my way out of the huge church only to find myself on a dark, dark street. A LONG street with only a single lamppost. So I start walking. I walked for what felt like ever, before my feet started to hurt. I took my heels off and kept walking. Then I got hot. I hiked up my skirt and rolled it up at the waist so I could get a breeze between my thighs. Took off my suit jacked and hiked up my shirt, unbuttoning a few buttons and tying it in a knot in the back, so now my belly and chest could get a breeze.

Next thing I know, there was a guy on the corner on this previously long deserted street and he was looking at me like I was a hooker. I looked down at myself in my dream and realized I did look like a hooker! I got very afraid and started running back to the church. I banged on the church door and it was opened to me. One of the ushers was holding up a lantern and grabbed me by the arm saying I was trespassing and was going to be arrested. I protested saying this was my mom's church and I was visiting her. The usher responded saying my mom was being arrested too for allowing an unbeliever to cross the threshold. I screamed, "Noooooo!" and then woke up.

When I woke up, I didn't immediately think anything about the second dream, I started looking around for that damn check. Seriously looking, like up in the bedsheets and on the floor around my bed. I was mad once I realized it was a dream.

I guess I'm still mad about it.

Questions for you.

1. What do you think this number 49 represents in my dream? Neither 4 or 9 is a favorite number of mine and I can't see any significance of them alone or together.

2. a. Why would I equate my mom's church with a large, unwelcoming one? In the real world, her church is quite small and they welcome me every time I come.

b. Where did the hooker come from? I don't dress like a hooker. Not even for Halloween. Maybe in my subconscious I want to dress like a hooker and try to get saved.

3. Where the f*ck is my check?!?!?!

Have fun interpreting my dreams because I can't make heads or tails of them.

~Nakena